Teen Daze

Would her beauty lessen if she believed its radiance?

Or can such beauty only thrive in shade?

I remember pain when opinions mattered relentlessly.

I wanted mother to reassure me.

"You are attractive," she mustered.

Her response confirmed my agony.

I whose words made cool kids wince.

Didn't fit in even when they decided I did

She is beloved but

Her auto default is to isolation.

I understand doubts you can't shake.

Awkwardness of self was also mine.

Do calm words of comfort cool nervous vitiation?

Shame at being different and overthinking it all?

Never.

Years ahead she'll remember my words

And ask 'why couldn't I believe her?'

I didn't understand time wasted on the preeners

Who flee self-reflection like summer feet avoid asphalt.

If only I could dissuade self-abnegation

Only suffering teaches lessons we don't learn

Forging wiser resolve to refuse separating our selves

Selves must swim deep into it to move beyond

The whirlpool whose saltiness sticks to your scabs

In the future you console another decoder of gazes

Spouting mindless code to confirm herself as castoff

Banishing gazes flail confidence like her very first swim.

Beauty is tragically wasted on young deniers

Unable to suss their manifold Amazonian powers

Except as rulers to rap peers' palms

A girl who thinks too much always doubts herself first.